Elgin Last Week
April 21, 2018
A St. Thomas native has come to the conclusion that Stephen Hawking did not know what he was talking about.
In an exclusive interview, Ron, a resident of Railway Crescent in the Saint City, revealed, “I was half way through Being and Time when I realized it made no sense. I loved the big bang it made when I tossed it into a black hole.”
Ron’s wife, Betty, chimed in, “My neighbour, Lorna, tells me this whatever-his-name-is – Hawking or something – was always late for everything. She said he should have written another book, and called it Being On Time.”
Ron and Betty spoke on the condition that Elgin Last Week respect their anonymity. “Please don’t use our names. We just don’t want to be harassed by the elites,” the pseudonymous Betty said.